I thought I would write a post about 2016. It’s been a year of ups and downs for ALL of us humans, but for me particularly it’s been even more so. I wrote a post not too long ago about my depression. I felt that I needed to channel it in a way that was easy for me to go back and look at, read over, and forever have that feeling in words. Today I’m writing to you not from a standpoint of depression and melancholy, but from a completely new perspective for me. One that I’ve had a very hard time accepting–Happiness. One of the main reasons that 2016 was hard for me was that I struggled with intense weight gain. My now husband proposed to me 1.5 years ago, and I gained weight accordingly. I wasn’t sure why or how this was happening; in actuality I did know how and why, but that’s beside the point. My point is I did have some hard times in 2016–We all did. I can’t believe I was so depressed during one of the happiest times in my life, and I also can’t believe we now have a Dorito with certifiable mental health problems as a president. I also had a very hard time with David Bowie’s passing, as his music helped me through college. Carrie Fisher, Debbie Reynolds, etc–celebrities that died whom I never knew. I could only wish to know such talent, but I didn’t. I mourn their passing like everyone else, and I mourn the loss of faith the nation has in common decency, but I digress. The reason I am writing this is because 2016 was one of the absolute BEST years of my life, and I’m going to tell you why. Because at the end of the year, I’d rather focus on the good–not the bad.
This year I married my best friend in the entire world. We met in October of 2013 and it was definitely a roller coaster. We met online, and since our first day we were inseparable. We lived far away from each other, but somehow made it work. He surprised me with a trip to Europe for our second Anniversary, and on October 4, he proposed in Munich. We have had good times, bad times, and the best times of my life. He is my true soul mate and marrying him has been the literal best moment of my entire life. We married October 15, 2016, an anniversary of our very first date.
Another personal best I’ve reached is being OKAY with myself. Being okay with the way I look, my personality, etc. Growing up is hard, but goddamn if you gotta accept looking in the mirror. Yeah I’ve had to go back to ordering wide calf boots and XL Sweaters, but I’m enjoying finding websites that offer larger size women’s clothes and boots. I have a husband that truly loves me to death and thinks I look like a goddess, and although validation and love from another isn’t what really matters, it helps me to accept myself at this moment.
I’ve also reached Financial well being. This is something very personal and hard to talk about. It’s something I’d like to cite as a 2016 win because I’ve always struggled with money. I’ve never been one of those people who is big into savings and doesn’t “Buy that purse because it’s not in the budget”. I’m a lady who likes nice things okay? Ever since I got married, Josh and I had discussed getting a Joint Checking account. We’d also discussed buying a house. Josh was lucky enough to get a bonus this year of a good amount that would really help with a down payment on a house. I, personally, wasn’t ready for a house yet and was looking forward to waiting when we’d both saved enough money. He was very Gung Ho about it, so I supported him. In talking seriously about how much I was suffering with my financial situation, we decided to forego looking for a house and using his bonus to pay off all of our credit cards, debts and merge our checking accounts. We decided to consolidate to 1 credit card/account for both of us and merge all accounts. It has been the absolute best thing for both of us–we find that we spend less, save more and are not living paycheck to paycheck.
Oh and did you hear about my dogs? I adopted them in 2016 as well. Jolene in February, and Dolly in June. They’re the loves of my life. ADOPT DON’T SHOP
Now this is going to seem super cheesy. But I’ve actually made really good, important friends this year that I know I will cherish for life. I’m a Sagittarius, which, not to be “that girl” but we as star signs only need a few good, close friends to feel happy. My best friends from college came down to be in my wedding, and as happy as that made me, I was even happier that my new friends made a point to come to my wedding as well. I’ve been really happy that I’ve had regular social dates and have kept in touch with friends from home as well as my new friends. I made the song “Make new friends and keep the old” come to LIFE.
Now here’s the cool part-I actually reached a lot of professional goals this year. If you remember reading this post, I complained about being depressed and unfocused. I also complained about not having real direction in life. I had interviewed for a job that I didn’t get that I thought I deserved, and the angry writing commenced. Come to find out, 3 months later and a series of interviews for various jobs later, I was offered that same job! Here’s the story: I work for a big company in Colorado called Otterbox. I’ve never felt so privileged in my life to work for such a cool-ass company where everyone is just so excited to come to work everyday. Unfortunately I worked in a part of the company where it was pretty much bottom level. Essentially it is a call-center. Okay not essentially– it is LITERALLY a call center. I worked for the company but not doing something that was up to my potential. Everyone knew I deserved more, and finally I got the call. I had applied for a job right before Christmas after I’d received an email from a co-worker telling me I should apply. 2 weeks passed and Christmas was around the corner when suddenly I got a phone call. I didn’t get the job I applied for, but I was being offered the same job I’d been turned down for 3 months ago! Without even interviewing! A friend of mine who’d gotten the job 3 months ago was moving up to the position I applied for, and I was getting her job! I didn’t have to interview since they knew how much I wanted it and how qualified I was. I felt like a weight had been lifted. I felt like I was the happiest person in the world. I was finally going to take a step towards my real potential. Doing something I actually love! What was better, was that it was right before Christmas, making it the best present I’d ever received.
And so in conclusion, 2016 has been probably one of my most memorable and best years. I would have to say another one of my favorite years has been when I lost close to 70 pounds in 2011-2012. I was so confident and strong in those years and the years after because I truly was able to look in the mirror and love who I saw looking back at me.
I’m currently trying to get back to that place I was 5 years ago. I am getting stronger and more okay with myself than I ever was when I was 20 and overweight, but I’d like to try as hard as I can to lose weight like I did back then. Which brings me to my next post, which will be my 2017 Goals. I think it’s so important to have goals that you write down, because they’re always there. I’m putting mine in a Blog Post because I’m hoping it will help keep me accountable. They say that you should never tell anyone about your goals because it gives you false hope. I’m sorry but FUCK that. Let’s do this 2017. Stay tuned.